Wednesday, April 20, 2005

My talking appliances

Ever imagined if your appliances talk in your home. How would you react? I for one, would be so nervous, particularly since I wouldn’t know what they are saying behind my back. I mean imagine a washer making rude remarks about the yellow stains on my dress? Or the coke I spilled on my skirt? And does the dryer laugh at the washers joke?

Think of it: refrigerator, dishwasher, toaster, oven, microwave, air conditioner, light switches, TV, stereos, dvd player, computer– everything in your home linked together wirelessly and your appliances chatting all the time

Refrigerator: Good morning Oven
Oven: Good morning Refrigerator. Did you have a good night?
Refrigerator: Well, it was quiet until that Dewdy girl came downstairs for ice cream around midnight
Clock (interrupts): It was 11:40 p.m actually and 12 seconds
Refrigerator: Oh whatever, she came down for a cherry vanilla flavor but she couldn’t eat just enough. She had me working for half hour.
Microwave: Personally I think shes putting on some weight. Some of those Microwave dinner she eats are simply loaded with fat. And you wouldn’t believe how much salt they have.
Scale: Well, just between you and me, she’s gained 5 lbs in the last 3 months!
Treadmill: Im not surprised, Dewdy hasn’t stepped on me in weeks.
Lighted Mirror: I know, she asks me all the time, do I look slim?
Printer & Computer(in liaison): She's been working us up researching and printing some greasy recipes.
They all murmer their argument.
Lighted Mirror (continues): Maybe I should just lower my wattage, you know, dim the light way down so she doesn’t look all that bad?
Dishwasher: I like that idea. Lets vote for it.

No matter what all these appliances may think, the computer geeks assure me that I will still be the boss, the decision maker. So I suppose I will have to learn to order my appliances around firmly. And I'll have to make sure they don’t get into petty squabbles, misunderstand each other, get scared during power cuts etc just like little kids.

And someday I know I’ll get back to my office from a late lunch and my assistant will say “Your Mr. Coffee called while you were out. He asked if you could pick up some French roast decaf on your way home?”
Posted by Dewdrop :: 7:48 PM :: 20 Scribbles!

Scribble your mind!

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